Tuesday, February 12, 2008
The Worst Date EVER!
I just love the rub on I used for the 'V'. It reminds me of those check yes or no letters we used to pass around to as kids. Anyhow, I forgot to fill you in on another date I had over a week ago now. (It was after the car accident date and before the Cha-ching date... got it?) Okay, so I met this guy at a nice place downtown in Nashville, and once we got in there I was wondering why he said we should wear jeans here. I didn't see anyone else dressed that way. It was one of those places where even the waiters were dressed better than James Bond. There was nothing I could do about my outfit a this point anyhow. The place had a fairly funky menu, so I opted for the safe chicken fingers. Besides, I was already dressed to wipe my hands on my own pants. The chicken fingers turned out to be more of a mountain of fried poultry than a delicate finger food more appropriate for eating during a date conversation. I nearly had to have a booster seat to look over my chicken mound at my date peering out over the top of his Eiffel Tower shaped mashed potato wad. I obviously didn't finish even half of my meal, but rest assured that my date got every crumb off of his plate before he started to indulge on my leftovers. We had already planned on going to a musical venue after dining, so I followed him in my own car to our second location. We didn't get one block out of the parking lot before he had his entire head and half of his torso out of the window while shaking his fist, yelling, and punching his horn at a car trying to merge in front of him. I was embarrassed, and I wasn't even in the same car! There's more. We pulled into the parking lot behind some building that I had yet to identify as something more than an old shack that had gone out of business or was about to be turned into a parking lot any day now. The show wasn't supposed to start for over an hour, so I suggested that we get ice cream down the street. He then walked around to my driver's side door and signaled me to put my window down. He then said, "I've got an emergency!" I heard a zip and a tinkle! Is he? No! YES!!! He's totally peeing right here next to me in the parking lot. I didn't know what to do, so I just turned up the radio for him. I didn't know if I was doing him a favor or myself. I don't know why I'm still on the date at this point, but I was still in shock I suppose. We made our way over to the ice cream place where I made my way to the bathroom to call for back up. I informed my secret bail-out agent to call me in 20 minutes with an emergency call from work before heading back out to enjoy my favorite Coke float. This part of the date wasn't so bad. I did have to clean up his huge sloppy ice cream mess before we left though. I guess it was bad. By the time we got back to the parking lot I had received my emergency call, and I told him I had to leave. He wasn't too upset, but he did want a goodnight kiss. He leaned in while I did the awkward head dance trying to give him anything but my lips. I was locked in one of those hugs that just doesn't know when to end while his "little buddy" started to get excited. That's when he points down at his crotch and says, "Compliments to the lady!" OMG! I'm sure I don't have to tell you that there has been no second date and nor do I plan on there ever being one. Ewwww! Deep breath.... back to the project: Here's what I did: I adhered, trimmed, and sanded the patterned paper to the letter first, and then highlighted various words with Star Dust Stickles. The three pieces of ribbon are just tied on and were found among my collection. The acetate wings are from Heidi Swapp and are adhered with Scrappy Glue. I then took a scrap piece of patterned paper from this collection and made a heart shaped tag using the Making Memories Tag Maker and applied it with a pop up glue dot. (The rub on is from 7Gypsies and was applied to the patterned paper before the metal rim.) I found the little red button stuck to the bottom of my foot, so I attached it to the tag with Scrappy Glue and covered it in Stickles as well. And...that's it!